Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger? ;)

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

Fuck me if I’m wrong but, haven’t we met before?

I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.

I’m an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus.

I wanna floss with your pubic hair. «wtf!? lol

The word of the day is “legs.” Let’s go back to my place and spread the word.

Smile. It is the second best thing you can do with your lips.

If you can dance, you have my hand, but if you can sing, you have my heart. I hope to God you can’t sing because I just wanna fuck you.

Do you have a BandAid? I just scrapped my knee falling for you.

Have you been drinking, or do I intoxicate you?

If I look the way you look when you walk, I’d walk everywhere I went.«whaa?

Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call FINE PRINT!

Is your dad a terrorists? Because you are the bomb.

Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up. «Seriously? WHO MAKES THESE?

Nice fucking weather. Want to?


Let’s bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.


Roflcopther.

likeabear:

ilikeyourfaceee:

i just need this on my blog forever and always

love this man and gif more than i can even describe

(Source: iamanafricanprincess)

likeabear:

ilikeyourfaceee:

whendidshegetallconfident:

corky-b-roll:

-fearmeforiamdeath:

nightingalesyndrome:

katizuo:

strangel:

cielswife:

come-hither:

kezzi:

“what are you doing?”
ohgod haha

“Until she opened the side-entrance, I had fancied, without thinking about it, that it must neccesarily be night-time.”
what in the fuck

Maybe right now, you dont even know who you are talking to, huh?lolwut? 

“It is around this time that he starts to talk a lot.”
does this mean I’m very good or very bad?

“I felt bad for him.”
……

He breathed wetly through the slimy hanging forest of his face.

“The question is, who are you?” LMFAO

“It’s not a matter of right and wrong”

“Cute.” WHAT

“She’s gone now, i think dead”
omg

“As far as i can tell, suzanne gets paid a lot of money to boss…”
um…………… okay………

“At such times you find yourselves adrift in anxiety, unprepared once more for the onslaught of stomach cramps and hideous sweat, wandering the city with vague thoughts of shoplifting.” W.t.f. lol

likeabear:

ilikeyourfaceee:

whendidshegetallconfident:

corky-b-roll:

-fearmeforiamdeath:

nightingalesyndrome:

katizuo:

strangel:

cielswife:

come-hither:

kezzi:

“what are you doing?”

ohgod haha

“Until she opened the side-entrance, I had fancied, without thinking about it, that it must neccesarily be night-time.”

what in the fuck

Maybe right now, you dont even know who you are talking to, huh?
lolwut? 

“It is around this time that he starts to talk a lot.”

does this mean I’m very good or very bad?

“I felt bad for him.”

……

He breathed wetly through the slimy hanging forest of his face.

“The question is, who are you?” LMFAO

“It’s not a matter of right and wrong”

“Cute.” WHAT

“She’s gone now, i think dead”

omg

“As far as i can tell, suzanne gets paid a lot of money to boss…”

um…………… okay………

“At such times you find yourselves adrift in anxiety, unprepared once more for the onslaught of stomach cramps and hideous sweat, wandering the city with vague thoughts of shoplifting.” W.t.f. lol

jensucks:


Jordan: Wait, you actually signed me up?Angela: I know, in a way it was wrong, but I just have a feeling that this is going to be really good.Jordan: I don’t know…Angela: So whoever is going to tutor you, their name is next to yours.Jordan: Brain? Kraykow?Angela: Wait, maybe this is a bad idea…Jordan: No. If, if I’m already signed up… Are you… Brain?Brian: Brian.

jensucks:

Jordan: Wait, you actually signed me up?
Angela: I know, in a way it was wrong, but I just have a feeling that this is going to be really good.
Jordan: I don’t know…
Angela: So whoever is going to tutor you, their name is next to yours.
Jordan: Brain? Kraykow?
Angela: Wait, maybe this is a bad idea…
Jordan: No. If, if I’m already signed up… Are you… Brain?
Brian: Brian.

(via majorhappener)

-marguerite:

<333333

-marguerite:

<333333

(via angeliners)